Living With A Disability

Living with a disability shapes life in many ways, I should know!

I was born with Spina Bifida and have done things a little differently throughout my life starting with walking with Splints and Crutches up until I was ten years old, when I started to use a wheelchair. Many people would think the decision to use a wheelchair full time would be difficult, but for a schoolgirl who wanted to carry her own things and keep up with others, it was a no-brainer.

Using a wheelchair has allowed me so much more freedom and independence than 10 year old me ever realised it would. Many people think having a disability defines a person, for me that is not the case, and it shouldn’t be for others either. My disability isn’t the whole me, it doesn’t dictate what I can or cannot do. Yes, it means I do things differently but its not a barrier, it doesn’t stop me.

Has my life been easy? Certainly not, but, you know what, a lot of people have had a harder time than I have. Yes, I’ve spent time in hospitals and undergone numerous spinal surgeries, my parents had to fight for my education in the 80’s (I’m showing my age now!), sometimes there is a step at a door, and I had to apply for 100 jobs before I even got an interview, or the reception desk at the doctors is higher than my head, the person serving me talks to the person with me instead of me, in all these situations and many more I have one mode of attack, my voice. I speak up, literally in a higher volume sometimes, but its all to be heard.

Most of the barriers I have faced have been put in front of me by others who don’t understand and don’t see the person before the disability. This understanding can be changed by asking questions and being open. Having a disability isn’t something to tiptoe around, more often than not its immediately visible, and is a part of human diversity. And understanding leads to inclusion and it is only with this that people are seen before the disability.

I am not saying that you should walk up to anybody with a disability and say “So what’s wrong with you?”, people may have a disability but they also have feelings, so please be polite! You wouldn’t believe how many times my disability has been the topic of conversation in the bread aisle at the supermarket.

Over the years barriers have changed and, on the whole, in a positive way, however there is more work that can be done. Its only with the understanding that all barriers, whether physical or perceived, can be eliminated completely. People with disabilities just need to be listened to, in my life I have seen level access increased, lower desks or tills installed and perceptions changing but there is still so far to go.

Have any of these barriers stopped my life from being fulfilling? Absolutely not. I work (in Marketing at Moonrise), I drive, I go on holiday (although we won’t talk about air travel and disabilities as we simply don’t have the time!), I have a husband, a teenage daughter, a mortgage and an excitable Cocker Spaniel named Teddy. Yes I do things a bit differently, but life is good.

Living with a disability can mean living differently, I am thankful that my husband and daughter can reach high shelves, but it certainly doesn’t mean living less. My disability has shaped me, it taught me to be resilient and to see barriers as opportunities to change, and ultimately, has made me the person that I am and I wouldn’t want to be anyone else.